**Just a quick note: I realize that I unintentionally left a few of you hanging yesterday. To my knowledge I am not pregnant. I’m just in a constant state of paranoia that I am, so I like to take pregnancy tests whenever they’re available. For example, because I have to go get blood work for my thyroid I asked her to just do a quick little pregnancy test on my blood too. See, I’m psychotic.**
Tuesday night was a pretty rough night for me. I was tired. I was sore. I’d pushed myself hard at the gym two days in a row and I was paying for it…big time. We put Zoe down at about 8:45 and I went to just lay on my bed. Brad came in and sat beside me because he didn’t have a clue what was going on with me. I started crying…no reason, just crying, and just started at him. That poor, poor man. Finally I blurted out, “I mean, has my body changed AT ALL?” Dead silence. I stared him down. He mumbled and fumbled around and then said, “Well, your hips.” That threw me for a loop. I thought maybe he would say my biceps or something. But, “My hips? My hips? You think my hips are skinnier?” At that point he was laying down on the bed and he held his hands up like way more than shoulder width apart and started talking. I just shrieked, “ARE MY HIPS REALLY THAT BIG?!?!?!?!” A look of panic flashed across his face and he started talking and motioning and mumbling all at the same time, “No! I didn’t mean that! No! I was trying to motion, shape! There’s shape.” I suggest the word “toned”, he says “YES! TONED! Your hips are more TONED!” And then I laughed. Hard.
It was completely unfair to ever ask Brad that question, because, let’s be honest, he never stood a chance. What guy does, really? It’s like quicksand. But still, as a woman, I feel compelled to ask…I guess he’ll have to live with it the rest of his life. On a serious note, one of the reasons that I’m motivated to lose weight is to look “good” for my husband. I mean, isn’t that what every wife wants? I guess probably not. But, I want to know that I can turn his head. He’s told me on numerous occasions that I don’t have to lose weight for him. It’s really freeing. It makes me want to even more, not even in a reverse psychology kinda way, but a really good, healthy way. He loves me just the way I am. He loves looking at me, just the way I am. Isn’t that awesome? You wanna know what one of my very favorite things about Brad is? He tells me that I’m beautiful when I’m wearing yoga pants and a t-shirt, when my hair is all kinds of crazy and Zoe just spit her food all over me. He also tells me I’m beautiful when I get all dolled up for a night out. It’s good for a girls heart to have that kind of balance.