Our Story – Part 1

You asked for it! You got it! Here’s the “not so short” story of how Brad and I met, fell in love, and got married in 4 short months. The first two parts of this story are going to cover the backstory, because our story kinda starts before we meet. Enjoy!

Skeletons in the Closet…

Ordinarily, I wouldn’t think that past relationships have any place in a love story of a husband and wife, but in our case, they definitely had an impact on the beginning of our relationship {especially for me}, so we’re going to talk about it. Brad’s past is easy…he dated, mostly in serious, long-term relationships, the last of which ended not so well. Right before his last relationship ended he’d bought a puppy, and an engagement ring. He never got to propose because the relationship ended right before he was planning on it, so the ring went back…but he kept the dog. For the next seven years Avery was the only lady in his life. He was a bachelor who’d almost given up on ever finding a wife. Eventually, he made peace with that and just worked his tail off at the restaurant. It was a quiet, peaceful life, just him and his dog and some pretty rowdy nights out with friends.

I, on the other hand, wasn’t so simple. I very seldom had clear, defined relationships. In fact, out of the few guys I actually dated, the longest relationship was 1 1/2 months. My hang-up with relationships was “always a guy, never a boyfriend”. I played the role of the “emotional girlfriend” and I played it quite well. You’d be surprised at how committed I could be to that role, always waiting for that one day when the guy would realize what was right in front of him and finally for the love of GOD ask me out. It never happened. In fact, quite the opposite happened, when the guy was ready to move on we would have a long conversation that always went like this:

Guy: “I hope I never gave you any reason to think that I liked you.”
Me: “No. You definitely didn’t.” {point blank lie}
Guy: “If I’d wanted to date you I would have asked you out.”

That’s good for a girl’s self-esteem, let me tell you! After a decade of this pattern being repeated, guy after guy, I finally realized that the common denominator was me. I determined to not look at another guy until he asked me out on a date. In my father’s words, I needed to become a bitch…and I was going to be! If a guy walks me to my car and then stands there to talk to me for 2 hours, so what? It doesn’t mean he likes you if he drives 24 hours straight to go to a wedding with you, or calls you 6 times a day? Nope, those are not “signs”. It certainly doesn’t mean that he likes you if he goes out of his way to make sure you’re taken care of, or takes you on road trips. Don’t even blink if a guy takes you to a theme park, just the two of you, and pays for everything all day long. Dinner and a movie, with a walk on the beach afterward? Doesn’t mean a thing either. For other girls? Sure. But, for me? No. That had been my life for a decade and I knew how this story ends. No, I would need to be asked out, specifically, on a date before I would even glance in another guy’s direction. I had no interest in being yet another person’s emotional girlfriend. Be aloof, play hard to get, be a bitch…that was my motto. The next guy that dated me was going to have to work for it!

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9 responses to “Our Story – Part 1

  1. I can’t wait for the rest of the story. I’ve played the “emotional girlfriend” all too often.

  2. Pingback: Our Story – Part 2 | Confessions of a Reluctant Housewife

  3. Wow…4 months! We dated 4 years!

    I’m stopping by from the commenting challenge. Have a great day!

  4. AHHH I CANT wait to read more!!!! 🙂 Thank you!!!!!!! PS – I actually believe that love stories often start where another love story ended.

  5. Love this! Described a great deal of my early 20s. 🙂 got here from Jenna’s Journey and enjoying the read!

  6. Pingback: Our Story – Part 3 | Confessions of a Reluctant Housewife

  7. Been there sista!

  8. Pingback: Our Story – Part 5 | Confessions of a Reluctant Housewife

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