My {imaginary} social circle

Tell me if this sounds familiar…You’re out and about with your family, maybe church..or perhaps you’re lucky and it’s date night, whatever it is, you go to the event, mingle, laugh, hold your significant others’ hand, make the rounds and then the party’s over. You go back to your car, get everybody all loaded up, and then grab your phone to see what you missed. Facebook. Twitter. Blogs. Random news articles. And just like that, you’re immersed in your imaginary life. Anybody? Anybody else except me? I have it bad. It’s a habit. As soon as my seat belt is buckled, I grab my phone and then Brad has to literally almost beg for my attention if he wants to have a conversation. Sometimes I even huff and puff and heave a great big sigh…as if having a conversation with my husband is a burden. It’s not. I love talking to my husband…it’s just sometimes I feel like I have nothing to talk about. I used to have a thriving social life. Seriously, back when I was single, I was busy from morning to late in the night with my social life. Work and school were secondary. In fact, when Brad asked me out on a date {it was a Sunday night} I told him I had Thursday dinner or Saturday breakfast open…I was booked, some days triple booked, the rest of the week. Now? Things have changed.

I still have friends. Not as many. The close friends I had before that have made it through the past 2 years of craziness with me are even closer than they were 2 years ago. The acquaintances that I had 2 years ago are no longer there. I’ve added a few friends, mainly due to the new seasons of life that I’m in…but, I’ll be honest, I’ve had to be very selective about it. I love it. It’s different. Sometimes I miss my crazy social life. I cherish the face to face time that I get with my friends, however few and far between those times are. But, it’s not my friends in real life that I spend the vast majority of my time with. Who I really spend my time with is Zoe and…

Regis and Kelly. We’re together every single morning. Sometimes it’s right on time at 9, but then sometimes I have to play it back on my DVR when Zoe goes down for her nap. I love them. I talk about them in daily conversation. I talk about them as if they were my best friends and they knew me as much I know them…

live-with-regis-and-kelly

I mean, Kelly and I are practically best friends. She just doesn’t know it yet.

kelly-ripa-straw

Later in the day, I have another tv date with Ellen. I started watching her when I became a stay at home mom. She’s stinking hilarious! Seriously. If you need to laugh…watch Ellen. I promise you….you’ll laugh, and you’ll probably cry too. That woman gives away mad cash to families all the time. Brad keeps telling me that I need to figure out how to get on her show. When I come up with a good idea, I’ll let you know.

Ellen-DeGeneres-show-01

And then, there’s my blog friends. {Check out my blogroll if you want to know who I’m talking about…or just ask and I’ll tell you who my daily must reads are} When Brad comes home and he asks me about my day, it’s not unusual at all for me to tell him that so and so had their baby, or a funny diaper story I read about. I tell him about room decorations, and tips for toddlers. I tell him story after story and he just looks at me, incredibly confused…because, I don’t know these people. I feel like I know them. I laugh. I cry. I rejoice. I commiserate. I congratulate. I receive advice. I give advice. Brad doesn’t get it…but they’ve become my friends. My imaginary friends. So stinkin’ weird! Isn’t it?

So, it seems almost second nature to grab my phone as soon as I’m in the car. Check my Facebook. Check Twitter. Comment. Respond to comments. Sink into my virtual world and forget that my husband is sitting there…in real life, and would like my attention. So, I’ve been working on it. {He doesn’t know that…but I have} I’ve made a conscious decision to not check my phone for at least 10 minutes after we get in the car. I’ve made the decision to sometimes not pick up the computer when we’re just sitting on the couch and reading blog after blog {although…AH! That’s haaaaaaaaaard} I’ve found that I have to be conscious about the life that is happening in my real world or I get too swept up in life that’s happening in my virtual world. It’s a really weird balance that I’m having to learn.

What about you? Do you find yourself attached to your Blackberry or iPhone? Are you attached to social media? What do you have to balance? How do you find balance in your life?

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9 responses to “My {imaginary} social circle

  1. Oh. My. Gosh. I thought I was the only one like this. I agree with everthing you said (except I can’t watch Regis and kelly or Ellen because I’m at work).

  2. so, as I sit here reading this, my husband & I are on separate couches reading on our phones. We defintely relate to this!! Great observations 🙂

  3. I struggle with this as well, especially during the days at home when I haven’t spoken to other adults yet. The internet can be a great thing to keep us stay-at-homers connected with the rest of the world, but I think just about everyone these days needs the reminder to pay attention to the life that’s right there in from of them. As a side note, I notice text messaging similarly interrupts time with friends and family, and though I can do it, too, it’s frustrating to think that other conversations are more important than the one I’m having with someone. We need to open our eyes and see what’s right before us!

    • Confession: I picked Brad up from work today and I was texting for a solid couple of minutes…and he’d just read my blog so he was giving me a hard time =)

  4. The other day I had an awful parenting day. Just awful. The baby was so fussy and I ended up yelling at him. At the end of the day I hought “Tommorow I will be a better mom. Today I really sucked at it.” And I thought of you bc you had a blog post about this awhile back. I even came to your site to write you. But I didn’t want to randomly comment on one of your different blog posts that had nothing to do with that. And I didn’t see a place to email. lol. So basically what I am saying is I totally understand and agree.

    • AW! I’m with you!!!!!!!!!! I totally understand and I’m so glad that you know you’re not alone! I think I’ve had SEVERAL blogs about this =) Btw…my email is reluctanthousewifeconfessions@gmail.com….and if you email me then you’ll be the very first person from my blog to email me! =)

  5. I can totally relate! I work full time (as you know) but I am single and my Son is grown, (well…you know this too. lol) so I look forward to fb and reading your blog Rebecca! I don’t do Twitter, but I am starting to read other blogs just since I started reading yours. Oh, and I have a Droid so I am liable to be reading your blog on the computer and ck’ing my email on my phone at the same time! Gotta love it! 🙂

  6. I love you girl! I remember the pre-mom days when we were teenagers and we thought it was fate that we loved the same colors! Its so cute to see you post- mom! Your doing awesome! And so great to read about others right there where I am at… makes me feel less crazy and alone! As for the hubby…. I think he is just like every other man! lol! keep up the good work! I love the blog.

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